my little China Grrl
Before I get to the China Grrl, I really suppose that I should relate what transpired yesterday. The morning was nice, with extra pancakes & one of my bizarre mixes of CDs on my changer. Trish left about 10:45; Becky from work gave her a ride.
Then I got on the computer. It'd been my plan to work some more on "Relayer", but instead, after I started out to check my email, went on hotornot.com & looked for people to double-match with. Someone with a star is now on my list, & she's a dominatrix: silk & chains. I got a message out of her a couple days ago, then nothing. I wrote her a 2nd message; still no luck.
I finally started to rework my short story, & reached the scene told from the alien's point of view, but decided that I really need to rethink the passage & do more in the way of showing the reader, perhaps by expanding the flashback.
Trish got a ride home from Becky (I believe), sat in the comfy chair eating veggies for awhile, then took her shower. While she was in there I played my keyboard some. I'm trying to use her time there as part of a daily discipline; whiplash, girl-child, in the dark.
So I didn't feel like making mac-&-cheese for last night's supper, so I proposed going out to El Taco Loco. I had a wheat shell, which is a real crazy taco, & Trish had a chicken enchilada & fries.
Then I met my little China Grrl on the web once more. The other night I decided to get on chat rooms to pass the time, & looked up "Joey Wong". I turned up a pharmacy student at the University of Florida who wanted to "cooperate" with me, but didn't make it clear if she was simply after a marriage of convenience, to get a green card (which wouldn't work 'cause I'm married); cyber-sex (which exasperates Trish & exacerbates VADIS); or even moving to China -- a country I'd much like to visit, but am not sure I'd want to stay there, mostly 'cause of my disability & the difficulties I'd have finding treatment.
What worries me is that I'm spending more & more time on the internet chat rooms & devoting less & less time to my writing. At this point, though, I don't want the story ready to be sent to Critters (& ultimately hopefully resubbed to Analog) until after my dose of Abilify has been in place for a week.
Monday is shot day, & it's only 1/4 shot, but it's enough to continue to have side effects. This includes sexual ones, so even though I'm feeling more desire, the delayed/complete lack of ejaculation is still bothersome, & then Trish asks, "Is it me?". No. It's 'cause the haldol is in my blood.
So today we're going to the Perky Pam Layout for lunch. Trish wants to pick up her Britney Spears thing at Creative Leisure, & I'm doing TA with Car-girl at 1:00. I want to pick up a bunch of groceries for the coming week, then go somewhere for a soda & discuss my story & my addiction to the internet. I hope no one tries to bust me & Trish up the way Hope's relationship got busted up. I still remember the scared little depressed girl sleeping on an air-mattress in the living room, watching TV all night, feeling suicidal & I've been there, too.
Hope springs eternal. We see her at the convention in Helena. I just wish we could get the family to realize Dave & Karen have mental illnesses. It was him selling her computer that really first made me feel something was awry. Hope is still mad about that & I don't blame her. John's attitude (it's a phase he's going thru) & Jerome's rationalizing her paranoia both have me feeling there's no hope for my brother & sister-in-law. Fuck Scientology, anyhow; we've got to get them off this herbal crap.
So that's where it stands. I've been spending a lot of time looking for fantasy girlfriends, even though Trish is my dream, my wish, my fantasy; truly, madly, deeply. Maybe the Abilify will kick in & cure me. Or maybe it's a "phase". Yeah, right, John. Anyway, talk to you all who've been following this thing tomorrow.
Then I got on the computer. It'd been my plan to work some more on "Relayer", but instead, after I started out to check my email, went on hotornot.com & looked for people to double-match with. Someone with a star is now on my list, & she's a dominatrix: silk & chains. I got a message out of her a couple days ago, then nothing. I wrote her a 2nd message; still no luck.
I finally started to rework my short story, & reached the scene told from the alien's point of view, but decided that I really need to rethink the passage & do more in the way of showing the reader, perhaps by expanding the flashback.
Trish got a ride home from Becky (I believe), sat in the comfy chair eating veggies for awhile, then took her shower. While she was in there I played my keyboard some. I'm trying to use her time there as part of a daily discipline; whiplash, girl-child, in the dark.
So I didn't feel like making mac-&-cheese for last night's supper, so I proposed going out to El Taco Loco. I had a wheat shell, which is a real crazy taco, & Trish had a chicken enchilada & fries.
Then I met my little China Grrl on the web once more. The other night I decided to get on chat rooms to pass the time, & looked up "Joey Wong". I turned up a pharmacy student at the University of Florida who wanted to "cooperate" with me, but didn't make it clear if she was simply after a marriage of convenience, to get a green card (which wouldn't work 'cause I'm married); cyber-sex (which exasperates Trish & exacerbates VADIS); or even moving to China -- a country I'd much like to visit, but am not sure I'd want to stay there, mostly 'cause of my disability & the difficulties I'd have finding treatment.
What worries me is that I'm spending more & more time on the internet chat rooms & devoting less & less time to my writing. At this point, though, I don't want the story ready to be sent to Critters (& ultimately hopefully resubbed to Analog) until after my dose of Abilify has been in place for a week.
Monday is shot day, & it's only 1/4 shot, but it's enough to continue to have side effects. This includes sexual ones, so even though I'm feeling more desire, the delayed/complete lack of ejaculation is still bothersome, & then Trish asks, "Is it me?". No. It's 'cause the haldol is in my blood.
So today we're going to the Perky Pam Layout for lunch. Trish wants to pick up her Britney Spears thing at Creative Leisure, & I'm doing TA with Car-girl at 1:00. I want to pick up a bunch of groceries for the coming week, then go somewhere for a soda & discuss my story & my addiction to the internet. I hope no one tries to bust me & Trish up the way Hope's relationship got busted up. I still remember the scared little depressed girl sleeping on an air-mattress in the living room, watching TV all night, feeling suicidal & I've been there, too.
Hope springs eternal. We see her at the convention in Helena. I just wish we could get the family to realize Dave & Karen have mental illnesses. It was him selling her computer that really first made me feel something was awry. Hope is still mad about that & I don't blame her. John's attitude (it's a phase he's going thru) & Jerome's rationalizing her paranoia both have me feeling there's no hope for my brother & sister-in-law. Fuck Scientology, anyhow; we've got to get them off this herbal crap.
So that's where it stands. I've been spending a lot of time looking for fantasy girlfriends, even though Trish is my dream, my wish, my fantasy; truly, madly, deeply. Maybe the Abilify will kick in & cure me. Or maybe it's a "phase". Yeah, right, John. Anyway, talk to you all who've been following this thing tomorrow.
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